I can't believe Canberra Marathon is just over a week away and I'm not going to be racing. I've run the last nine of them - this was going to be my 'Griffin' tenth. It was also supposed to be the first time I ran under 2:50. Based on Melbourne last October, if I hadn't been injured and I'd kept up the training with Sean, I'm pretty sure I could have done it.
Instead, I'm frustrated as all hell. Looking down the barrel of months and months of modified training in the hope of getting back to where I was four to five months ago. And that's assuming I can actually start following a program soon and incorporating some track/fast running without breaking.
Without breaking. As Hamlet would say, "ay, there's the rub." I'm concerned that after all this I'm going to be overly cautious and not work as hard as I should because I'll be nursing my tendons. However, if I'm NOT overly cautious and I do end up breaking again I'll be left with nothing.
Is a modified program in which you remain cautious in the name of self-preservation better than risking it all to be the best you can possibly be?
I don't want unanswered questions. I want to know I gave it everything. I just hope over the coming months I discover that I do have more to give.